Tuesday, February 8, 2011


Would this guy do anything shady? Not Marty! Not on my watch! Mr. Markowitz has been fined for using his chief of staff as his lawyer for a house sale. It's not like his chief of staff isn't a lawyer! I mean, it's not like that time I impersonated my boyfriend's lawyer so that I could get a refund from Priceline.com because he booked a hotel room by the airport in Shreveport, LA even though we were going to New Orleans. I mean, come on!

Plus his chief of staff had to take over after his first lawyer was gave birth. Sweet Jesus this is sexist too! SAVE MARTY NOW! It's not like he was paying his nanny to work his coop shift: http://www.fuckedinparkslope.com/home/cool-or-not-cool-having-your-nanny-do-your-coop-shift.html... see you in the Linewaiters' Gazette! Can you imagine the embarrassment when all the denizens of 7th Avenue find out their upstairs neighbor thought of this first? ("Fuck, why am I slumming it with all those patchouli-wearing hippies when I could have just sent Maria? I'm going to Whole Foods! Fuck it!") Park Slopers are still pissed because they can only get Spanish-speaking nannies because their Upper East Side counterparts hire all of the French speakers, read: white. ("If they speak Spanish they're only allowed as far as my car! And only when I'm not in it!").

Anyway, I'm sad because it appears Marty may have messed up. I don't believe it though. Not one bit.

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