Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Arthur Sulzberger Jr Can Kiss My ASS

Okay - so I've tried to avoid this subject altogether because I just hoped it wouldn't happen. I can't even begin to explain the anger I feel over this fucking Pay Wall. So this is my open letter to Arthur Sulzberger Jr:

Dear Mr. Sulzberger Jr:

I buy your newspaper in print form often. I would subscribe if I knew you could get it to me in my fourth floor walk up in Crown Heights but good luck fighting of the rats who will nibble on it for their nests. What am I supposed to do? Do you not care about me? About poor people in general? People who can't afford a door man or an apartment outside of Breukelen? I even buy the international edition when I summer abroad. And I know that's the off season to summer in Paris but it's all I can afford. You should be paying me!

Now you want me to pay for a digital subscription? I'm sorry, is this some plot out of a Philip K. Dick novel? I am not in the future. I'm right here. And the amount of traffic I drive to your sight from mine, I'm sure, far outweighs whatever articles I'm reading. And now you tell me I have article left for free this month and I'm forced to choose between Maureen Down and Gail Collins?! Don't make me do it. I have mommy issues. You are a bad, bad man Sulzberger Jr.

But wait! I'm a Jr. too. Please dear G-d don't limit my article count. What the shit am I supposed to read at work? MSNBC? Ugh. Who am I? Rachel Maddow?

I even saw that Bill Cunningham movie and thought how nice you were to throw him a birthday party. I know times are tough at the Times. That is of course, why you moved into that fancy new building on 42nd Street and then had to sell a lot of it off. I'm sure you're tightening your belt as well. Maybe I'll see you in Paris this August? Kidding. I'm sure you'll be in East Hampton. Or ... gasp... West Hampton?! Times are tough.

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