Friday, December 30, 2011

I know, I know

Listen - It's been nearly a month since I got my tired, fat ass off of the sofa to write this shit. I get it. But we've been under a lot of stress. (I was going to say duress but I'm not sure of the spelling or definition - damn you home schooling!). Anyway, there are a couple of reasons: A: Gorgeous was exhausted after being date raped by Art Basel. That shit is just plain stoopid and she is now in recovery.

Crystal Bridges, well, she's taking longer to build than originally thought. But Roberta likes her so that's enough for us over here at The Interlopere.

Actually I don't know if Ms. Smith likes us or not as I haven't had the opportunity to read this. Read: I've been drunk trolling the Internet every night - Crystal on Manroulette:

Crystal: Hi


Crystal: 9 inches here!


Crystal: Look at Pierre!


The other reason is that Crystal is still working her two jobs, one at the 5 & 10 and the other at the soup kitchen, putting slosh in tin cups and then hocking doo doo and tampons. This will end soon.

Another reason is that I've been busying myself getting my transcripts from the aforementioned home schooling so I can finally get my Associate's from DeVry. Mom won't return my calls.

What the shit?!

The whole point to this is that Crystal, Gorgeous and the entire The Interlopere family are going to come back large in 2012. We're going to join Skanz - that's right... Skanz! and hopefully get our figure back.

I know, I know it's cliche to start anew on January 1 but right now that's all we have so shut the shit down.

So things to look forward to in 2012: Our top ten lists of: our favorite outfits, best places to masturbate in a 500 square foot apartment, how to cover up face herpes when you have an Internet hook up, crabs, best Deepak Chopra books I've never read, dead people.

Okay, love you all toots!

One more cup of coffee 'fore I go... to the valley below - Bob Dylan ft. Emmylou Harris

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