Saturday, December 31, 2011

Sisters AREN'T doing it for themselves.

Good Morning Dear Readers -

I'm pissed. Partially because as Crystal was resting on the toilet after too many cups of coffee I came across this in today's newspaper:
Now most of this articles is Obama loves queers but won't say it because it's too risky for an election year. Although there is a (small) part of it that says Obama loves queers and may say something before the election because the Republicans are so anti-gay that all the rest of us that don't eat opossum and fuck our sisters (wait? what?) need someone to vote for.

Fine. But then this little gem, which really burns Crystal's britches.

In October, two weeks after the military’s ban on openly gay soldiers ended, the president received a standing ovation at a dinner held by the Human Rights Campaign, a group that advocates for gay rights. He felt comfortable enough with the crowd to joke about having held “productive bilateral talks with your leader, Lady Gaga.”

Hmmmm. Well, HRC, not okay with me. A: they have many times thrown trans health issues away. And we all know that trannies need health care like everyone else - and yes I go the memo and no I don't care.

B: HRC will give a standing ovation to a president who has openly said, many times, that he does not support gay marriage? Listen, I'm not sure I do either - or any marriage for that matter - but Crystal is not being feted for her support of queers. Or is she, every day in every way as she struts up and down Rivington, looking for that dollar pizza slice?

C: And this is really the bee in my mother-fucking-I-am-worshipping-the-lord-our-savior-Hillary Rodham Clinton-bonnet: productive bilateral talks with your leader, Lady Gaga. Exsqueeze me? Now for all the queens in the audience you may want to stop reading because I am sure to offend. But what the fuckin' shit fuck? Really? We are not all apple-tini drinking, Lacoste wearing (Crystal wouldn't dream!), clutch carrying faggots who wear matching bow ties with our new husband OMG Isn't he so cute and he's a total power bottom. Do you have meth?

What the fuck? I'm sure the HRC crowd creamed their collective panties full of bleached assholes and shaved balls and less pubic hair than Pierre after his balls went to the place in the sky I like to call Grandma Louise's Compound - bitch is still going strong. Go Lou!

Why do gay men in particular participate in this minstrel? Will & Grace are dead. Grace is now do something on some new show where Steven Spielberg talks about Marilyn Monroe. And I think Will might actually be dead.

This is the equivalent of Obama going to the NAACP and saying that he has had "productive bilateral talks with your leader, Oprah." Oh wait.

Okay, it's like if he went to Chinatown and said that he has held "productive bilateral talks with your leader, Mickey Rooney, in Breakfast at Tiffany's.

Why do we continue to take this? I'm telling you, once more, Dear Readers HIllary is Saviour. British version bitches. And fuck even that. Just live your own life. You really need the state to tell you it's okay. Because you'll never feel affirmed because they are never going to tell you that going to the Bathhouse high on meth and sucking twelve dicks in one night is okay (but really, I didn't swallow.) UGH.

And speaking of Gaga - bitch is a product. She's like 3 years old and had a store at Barney's filled with shit to get young gays to blow their wad on garbage. She should at least wait until she washed up like her idol, GrandMadonna, to start selling crap like her new fragrance Truth or Dare, available at fine department stores everywhere. What the shit is that going to smell like? The '90s? Vitamin B shots, Restalyne and Human Growth Hormone? African Placentas? You know that's why she is Raising Malawi. So she can take all these babies and get the after birth (AFTER BIRTH - Grace Jones, Boomerang) in hopes of rejuvenating her youth, career, life.

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